Kakashi is secretly Tarzan?
by SpiritofSpring
Summary: Team 7 finally crack, Sasuke and Sakura want to move villages as they find out Kakashi's a pyscho and Naruto finds it cool. First humour fanfic enjoy...


**Author's Note: Hey people, I thought I would try my hand at a comedy one shot hope you like it. XD**

**Disclaimer: Don't own Naruto.**

* * *

Team 7 once again found themselves at the training grounds ready for a full day of youthful training.

Sakura, Naruto and Sasuke were awaiting instructions from Kakashi who had his back turned to them, and was once again reading his filthy little orange book.

The ever stoic Uchiha raised an eyebrow.

Sakura was about to comment on his apparent lack of attention to them when he let out a girlish giggle.

_WTF? _

_OMG! _

_I think he has finally cracked._

The three stepped away from the elder male.

The 17 year olds exchanged weary glances at the older man, until Naruto cracked out laughing.

He started rolling around and slapping the ground.

_Ooooooook I am officially surrounded by idiots, except for Sasuke-kun that is._

"Shut the Fuck UP Naruto you moron!" Sakura yelled, her eyebrow twitching with disgust.

"Dobe" muttered Sasuke

Naruto shut himself up, stood up and then paced towards Sasuke pointing a finger at him.

"You wanna say that again TEME!!"

"Dobe"

_And here I thought Uchiha's don't repeat themselves. God damn hypocrite._

"TEME"

"Dobe"

"TEME"

"Dobe"

"AHHHH enough already, you sound like a pair of old ladies the way you to rant on at each other."

Sakura huffed at them; she then turned to her Sensei.

She glared at the back of his head then…

...

**...SMACK**

Sakura had successfully landed a good hard smack to her sensei's head.

"You didn't have to hit me that hard Sakura"

She glared at him.

"Cough…

...well…erm today we are going to practise the art of espionage"

The three teens straightened themselves up and sharpened their senses ready for the all important instructions.

"would you please carefully observe this elite ninja art"

Kakashi's hands flashed together and made a dozen of hand seals.

The three focused on his every movement.

"Stalking no jutsu"

...

TTTT

Huh?

Sakura slapped her head.

"What the f…you only pulled out a pair of binoculars…friggin idiot" Sakura yelled.

The three sweat dropped as the so called Copy Nin randomly looked through his binoculars in any given direction.

Sasuke's eye twitched.

And Naruto stood amazed at his Sensei's talents.

"Sakura…don't call you sensei an idiot, because as you can see I am clearly not one" Kakashi was still doing what he does best.

That being a total moron.

Because of Kakashi's fantastic ninja skills he could clearly see that his team was not amused.

Behind his cool façade inner Kakashi would have liked to smack them all for not noticing his awesomeness.

"Naruto, Sasuke, Sakura…because you think my ninja tactics are not to your standards I will set you a mission"

Naruto gulped

The atmosphere had turned dark.

Sasuke glared at the grey haired man.

"Mission…

...

...

...Fly to the moon"

Tumbleweed blew across the training ground.

Sakura bit her lip to stop herself from screaming.

She calmly took in a deep breathe.

"…You..you can't be…se…serious? Can you?"

"PLEASE TELL ME YOU ARE NOT SERIOUS?!"

Sasuke kept his facial features in check.

Although inside his mind he was going crazy.

WHAT THE HELL?

HOW CAN ANYONE FLY TO THE MOON!!

For god sakes we haven't even invented cars yet!

And I have no idea what a car is but is sure in hell won't fly us to the moon.

Okay I know I can have wings once the cursed seal is working but I don't think I will b able to reach the moon.

God knows how far away it is, plus I would have to carry the dobe and Sakura.

Wait…why the hell would we want to go to the moon?

Kakashi smiled.

It was kinda creepy.

That creepy pervert with that smile.

Something was not right.

"…well you can either do that thing I just said or you can comb my hair, your choice"

Kakashi was laughing on the inside…

yes my dear students you will comb my hair,

there is no way for you to fly to the moon,

heck I don't even know what the moon is!

My evil plan hath commenced.

YOU WILL ALL COMB MY BEAUTIFUL HAIR!!

MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

AAAAAAAA

AAA

A

...

"ermmmm…Kakashi sensei why do you want us to comb your hair?" Naruto asked backing away from the man who was hugging himself and patting his hair.

Freak

_I think I know. He's just a narcissistic jerk. _

Sakura will probably just think I'm a narcissistic jerk, but I'm not.

You all need to comb my hair because…

it…

is…

ALIVE!!

MUAHAHAHHAHAHHA…cough…good thing no one can hear me think, Kakashi thought.

Sakura smirked.

An evil thought had just crossed her mind.

_MUAHHAHA…well if I have to comb his shabby gay hair then I think he should pay. _

_Ha know one will know. _

_I will just sneak in and chop if off. _

_He doesn't need hair. _

_It will be in the dead of night. _

_MUAHAHHAHAH…_

_Wait I don't even know where he lives…_

_Well I will soon find that out!!_

"well, I tell you what sensei, we will brush your hair but it will have to be tomorrow since I have to, er, go somewhere, bye" Sakura started to back away from the group, " Oh yer, one more thing, where do you live sensei?"

"…in a tree, why?" Kakashi answered.

Naruto's eyes bulged, he had no idea that his own sensei lived in a tree, that was soooooooo cool!

"…in a tree? And where would this tree be located?" Sakura asked smiling sweetly.

Meanwhile her thoughts where screaming at the elder male ninja.

_In a tree? _

_Seriously? _

_Wtf? _

_Why would anyone live in a tree…unless he is secretly Tarzan…no Tarzan still lived in a tree house. _

_That god forsaken idiot._

"underground" Kakashi stated.

"…so let me get this straight you live in an underground tree?" Sasuke questioned his sensei while slowly loosing all respect for the man.

"why yes. Orochimaru rents it out to me" Kakashi answered happily with his eyes twinkling at some happy memories hidden away in the depths of his mind.

EWWWW

Let's not even go there.

The three younger ninja stand stunned.

"WHAT THE HELL, YOU CAN'T BE SERIOUS, CAN YOU?"

"Does it look like I'm joking Naruto? Stop screaming!" Kakashi replied covering his ears.

He was obviously deadly serious!

"SENSEI YOU ARE SOOOOOOOO COOL, when I become Hokage I'm going to make everyone live in trees just like you!!" NARUTO SHOUTED.

A dozen birds left the trees surrounding the group scared from Naruto's outburst.

"OH MY GOD, that's it I'm moving to the Sand village, at least there will actually be some sane people there" Sakura whispered while disappearing in a puff of smoke.

They are probably on drugs Sasuke thought.

"Hey, wait up Sakura, I'm coming too" Sasuke called out also disappearing in a puff of smoke after Sakura, this left Kakashi and Naruto dancing in circles in their own crazy world.

* * *

Far, far far far farrrrrrrrrrrr away…in the Sand village…

"That's it everyone I demand you wear animal costumes whenever you go anywhere" Gaara proclaimed.

"But what about when we sleep or use the toilet, do we still have to wear it?" Temari questioned Gaara's absurd proclamation.

"erm…..let's see.. From now on no-one is to sleep or use the toilet any more!!" Gaara decreed.

"You can't do that" an elder from the council objected.

"Yes, I can since I am the almighty GARRA!!"

The End!

* * *

Wow ninjas' are crazy. It's probably all that killin!


End file.
